One of the biggest problems plaguing our school system today is students excessively using the restroom during class time. How ridiculous it is that high schoolers believe they have the right to use said facilities whenever they please! If this atrocity is not put to a stop soon, life   will spin even further out of control.

What makes this whole situation more preposterous is that students have the audacity to argue necessity. Many don’t realize that the absurd amount of minutes allowed between classes offer more than enough time to make these trips! An entire five minutes is allotted, four if a teacher decides to let the class out late. The lengthy break includes plenty of time to go from class to locker, gather materials for the next class, walk across the school to another room, and settle into a seat before the bell. If a student does not talk to anyone, gets his locker combination on the first try, and remembers everything necessary for the next class, he will have a solid minute to use one of the bathrooms, which are always fully stocked and functioning at Collegedale Academy.

Another point the female public makes is the unexpected factor of  “that time of the month.” Girls claim that spontaneous trips out of class are required and that teachers should be understanding. Again, ridiculous! Maybe they should use better time-management techniques and handle their issues during the efficient minute leftover for the lavatory. Otherwise, they should simply wait for the next bell to ring.

If the need to go to the bathroom distracts students too much to study properly, they should consider dropping out of high school since they will never make it in the real world. Leaving the classroom AT ALL should be strictly prohibited, even if one forgets needed materials, experiences a violent coughing fit, or makes other basic mistakes.

DISCLAIMER: This article is intended to be humorous, satirical piece.